Maybe some of the best times??
With more of the best times to follow??

Seasons of Change

As the temperatures drop along with the autumn leaves I find myself hunkering down into a state of calm and reflection. While Summer is so much about going fast and playing hard and "doing" so much, Fall seems to be more about preparing and fortifying for what is to come... (I really want to throw in a Game of Thrones reference but I will resist!).

This has truly been a season of reflection and gratitude for me so far. I reached the fifty day mark in my sober journey last Sunday and I'm so proud of myself. I knew this journey and goal was possible, but I really wasn't sure what it was going to be like, how it would feel, and if I would change through the process. I have a lot of work to do still and though I'm technically halfway, I feel like it's really only just beginning. At this fifty day mark the "shine" is off a bit. While I am so very proud of myself, the smug feeling of accomplishment has faded, leaving what I imagine is a very realistic and common feeling of "now what?". Where even two weeks ago I was focused on saying no to a drink because "no" meant I could cross off another day on my sober calendar, now that "no" has something standing behind it. Now it's more about the why and less about the why-not?... I want to be mindful about all of the decisions in my life, but this one in particular right now.

Having a drink had become such a habit for me, an action that had very little, if any conscious thought behind it. I really want to think about why I'm choosing to say yes or no. The thought that keeps popping up for me is, "would a drink make this occasion better?" I honestly think there are times an adult beverage does add to the moment, but where I was 50+ days ago this was not how I was making the decision... it was all just a mindless habit.

* Side Note Book Talk - I've been reading "The Power of Habit" by Charles Duhigg and it's really been an interesting exploration of why we form habits and how we change them... I'm not finished with the book yet but I'm excited to see how it might help me understand this better.

I really have enjoyed going to dinners, hanging out with friends, celebrating amazing things and people, all while completely sober. It's been a heartening and proud realization for me to understand that I can be fun and relaxed and funny without drinking. Admittedly, there have been times when I really did think a drink would add to the event or occasion (new beer release at The Rockslide, Birthday Celebrations with my Grandparents, finishing a long run, etc.), but sobriety certainly, without doubt, did not take away from these experiences. I can honestly say that I would choose a lifetime of sobriety over ever going back to where I was just a few short weeks ago. Being sober has lifted a dark and heavy blanket from my soul, giving me the strength and hope to work through the things that were really dragging me down. It's a journey that I understand will take longer than 100 days, but I really feel like the seasons are changing and I can't wait to see what's ahead.

Until then,
katykatxo

Time Flies...

The days race into weeks, the weeks speed by into months, and before you know it seasons have passed and the things you once were simply planning for have come and gone. On one hand this makes me sad, but the other hand is so full of the good things that have happened lately I realize I need that sad hand to get over it and help me carry it all! It's been an amazing couple of weeks with lots to celebrate and enjoy.

I've realized quickly that I really need to be taking more pictures in order to make this blog a truly fun and enjoyable one! Luckily in two weeks time I will be taking a photography class followed by a Photoshop class and I hope I can challenge myself to take and publish more current photos... this post about all the great things would definitely be more fun if I had pictures of all the events!

Last weekend my youngest brother Danny and his dog Sampson drove to Colorado from California to spend a week with us. Sampson will be staying in Colorado as Danny gets ready to deploy in the near future. It's been SO fun to have them both living with us! I had pretty much left the house by the time Danny was 12 or 13, so I never really had the chance to live with him as peers like I did my brother Scott. I've loved having him close even for a short while. Sampson has so far fit right in with our dogs... Gus is in heaven having a crazy friend to play with all day. Millie is... adjusting.





Happy Dogs
Sampson, Gus, and Millie



Once Danny and Sampson arrived we got a few hours of sleep and then packed up and headed over to Ft. Collins to celebrate my Grandparent's 80th birthdays. Here is where I really wish I had taken some pictures, it was so great to celebrate these two amazing people together with lots family. We had almost all the family there but we missed our Pennsylvania cousins so much! It was a really special night with lots of stories and laughs. I hit my 50 days of sobriety on Sunday and though I really wanted to enjoy a glass of wine with the amazing lobster boil we had, I enjoyed the evening so much even without it. James and I were lucky to spend one night with my brother Scott and sister-in-law Carrie which equaled extra time with them. Then we hopped right back in the car and cruised home listening to a very interesting and tense Broncos game on the radio. All told this was only a 24 hour trip, but packed full of great moments and memories.

James took this fantastic photo in Vail.

 

Since we got back we've been working with the dogs and trying to get Sampson settled in with the pack. I think it's going to go really well, I'm excited to have Sampson as part of our family for a few months!

 

 

I also finished a fun craft project at home. I was going to try and take step by step photos, but again, not so good at taking pictures very frequently. So basically I ordered a 4'x2' 24-gauge paintable metal panel cut to fit a random popout over my kitchen counter. The metal panel is pretty lightweight, but not so thin that it would be too flexible. I painted it with four coats of aerosol chalkboard paint... look a picture!

I then marked out a 7x6 grid of 3"x3" squares and used a paint marker to create a permanent calendar grid on the top of the metal panel that I can modify each month. I added Sunday - Saturday initials using a paint marker at the top, sweet talked James into helping me screw it to the wall, and voila! A magnetic chalkboard in my kitchen! The chalkboard pens that are available now make it really fun and easy to use and decorate. I'm really happy with the results...



 

 

So it's really been a crazy past week... I'm looking forward to slowing down a little bit this weekend and spending time with James celebrating our one year anniversary. It's hard to believe a year ago I was getting ready to marry my best friend! Time flies when you're having fun!

 

until then,

katykatxo

Kate's Favorites*

(*Subject To Change)

Wow. I was all ready to do a Friday post before the weekend and then here we are at Wednesday already!! And October is here too!! Where does the time go?

It's been a busy last few days. As my dad would say, I'm running an intergalactic doggie daycare lately! We are preparing to welcome a third dog into our family for the next eight or nine months when my youngest brother brings his husky Sampson to us this weekend! Danny is deploying next month and Sampson is coming from Southern California to enjoy a Colorado winter. We are really hoping all the dogs get along and that life continues on mostly as usual even with an extra beast around! I'm really trying to enjoy some quality time with my furbabies before the new kid arrives. We also had Gus' girlfriend Merra with us last weekend, and man, that is a circus! Gus and Merra stay revved at 100% the entire time they are together. They have so much fun together and they are EXHAUSTED when Merra goes home...

Sweet Mera

Gus loves having his girlfriend Mera around! She is a sweetheart, but snores louder than any human I've ever met! I feel bad for my husband when I'm elbowing him at night thinking it's him snoring, but finding out it's actually Merra!

Handsome Sampson - Can't wait to have him here

I think having Sampson around will be good for Gus and Millie too, even if it means making some changes around the house to make it all work! I think he will LOVE going snowshoeing this winter.

How about some favorites from the week?

1. Finished this fun craft!

2. Ordered the materials for something like this magnetic chalkboard calendar! I will put up my step-by-step DIY next week! *I did finish my version and I LOVE it! I will post some pictures and instructions later!

3.  My new laptop!! Yay for a machine that doesn't groan and buzz and overheat!

4.  My awesome and amazing grandparents... The whole family (minus some cousins :(...) will be gathering together in Ft. Collins this weekend to celebrate their 80th birthdays... Can't wait!

5. This guy... we are celebrating our first anniversary next weekend. Can't believe it's been a year!

Have an awesome rest of the week!

Until then,

katykatxo

Joy, Kindness, and Gratitude

I've been thinking a lot lately about what qualities I want to see more of in my life. These are elements, concepts and ideas I would like to see actualized every day, to the point that they are natural and accepted as expected. About a month ago I chose Joy, Kindness, and Gratitude as characteristics and actions I would like to experience more frequently every day in my life. I was pleasantly surprised to read this article on Huffington Post that listed these traits among those practiced by "Happy People". I know it sounds pretty obvious that joy and kindness lead to happiness but thinking about these things specifically and with intent definitely helps me experience them more fully.

Joy - I want to be a more joyful person. I'm working on taking note of the many moments during the day that something makes me feel happy. It's as simple as waking up to a furry puppy face on the side of my bed, delicious warm lattes in the morning, or as lovely as seeing my mom greeted warmly by a ton of people as we ate lunch together on her college campus. I want to find joy in the gorgeous sunset, the ripe tomatoes on the vine, and my husband letting me put my chilly toes under his leg to warm them up. Just noticing these little or large things make my heart feel just a little bigger and warmer. 

Kindness - I want to be a more considerate person, thinking of others before I act solely for myself. I want to notice others being kind to those around them; I think kindness is contagious and spreads easily. It's all too easy for me to plead tired, or busy, or unaware when it would benefit me equally to step outside of my own head and do something kind or to say something friendly to someone near me. I know this will help make me a better wife, friend, daughter, and coworker!

Gratitude - I feel so blessed in my life... but why is it so easy to focus on the negative? I want to be thankful for all of my blessings and all of my challenges, for they will help me grow. I want to find the positive in every moment and be grateful for each day. I do really believe what the quote says at the top... "When we notice our blessings and practice gratitude, our reasons to be grateful multiply."

I want these things in my life. I really want others to see these elements practiced daily in my life... I hope they spill into all areas of my life. Practice makes perfect, right?

Until then,

katykatxo

"She decided to start living the life she imagined. She believed she could, so she did. She replaced her fear of the unknown with curiosity. She looked around, and life was pretty amazing." Kobi Yamada

I think I remember having big hopes and exciting dreams. 

Everyone has dreams and plans and "what if"s, right?

That Attitude! That Hair!
This girl had dreams!! And super cool glasses!

Lately I'm having a very hard time remembering what my dreams and goals were. I feel stagnant. I don't think this is a new thing, a recent blank spot in my memory, or a sudden missing piece. I think my dreams and plans been slowly dissipating, scattering in fear, and going into hiding for years as I've trucked along in cruise control, taking the path of least resistance. Where did all the dreams go? A life without these dreams and plans and goals feels like a room without fresh air. Can you survive in that room? Sure, for awhile. Can you thrive? I don't think so.  I don't know what has changed recently, but right now this feels important, urgent, a critical exploration to discovering... something. It's time to do some soul searching.

I feel like I'm making steps in the right direction. I'm writing again and this has been an awesome start to my self exploration. I'm running a lot which helps keep my mind and body functioning on a happy, healthy plane. I'm in therapy with a really great Art Therapist who is helping me work through the questions and challenges. Being sober helps too. A lot of minutes and hours have been wasted in my life recently working my way through a bottle of wine on the couch every night. Ending up slightly sloshed every evening has a way of shutting down that inner voice challenging you to cultivate your dreams and reach for the stars... Can I do that whilst sitting on the couch with a glass of wine? No? Then no thank you and good night. Not to say that many a dream and plan and adventure haven't been thought up over hilarious and fun drinks with friends and family (Baywatch Gorillas anyone?), but unfortunately this hasn't been the norm lately.

I'm ready to come up with more brilliant ideas like this!!

Not having alcohol in my life has definitely challenged me to fill my time with other pursuits. Reading, crafting, running, spending time with James and friends all have helped round out the days with lots of love and positive thinking. 

Foxy Coffee Cozy Craft!

I'm craving the fullfillment of dreams and hopes and "what-if"s. I want to go out into this crazy awesome world without fear. I want to be curious. I want to explore what might be possible in all of my wildest imagination. It's a journey that I gave up on at some point and I'm fully ready to gather all my tools and set out again with joy and an adventurous spirit.

Until then,
katykatxo

Kate's Favorites*

(*Subject To Change)

Friday again!! And it really, truly, finally feels like fall! I LOVE fall, and not in just a "Pumpkin Spice Latte" kind of way... because yuck! not a fan! But I am a huge fan of the cool mornings, warm afternoons, boots, leggings, scarves!! And seriously, don't you want to hang out all night here with some friends this weekend??

I also really love that I don't have to schedule my runs around the daily temperature! I was happy to take my puppies on TWO runs yesterday, one at lunch and another with my momma after work! Both were gorgeous and much needed for everyone involved. It doesn't hurt that the perfect running temps are just in time to get my butt in gear for the Myrtle Beach Half Marathon I have in just 4 weeks! So here are some things that are getting me motivated for this awesome race vacation with my bestie Jes!

1.  Running makes me happy... running makes my dogs happy... happy dogs make me even more happy... me happy makes my husband happy!

2. A few songs on my new half marathon playlist...

    Daft Punk - "Get Lucky"

    Florida Georgia Line - "Cruise"

    Matt Nathanson - "Run"

3.  Everyone needs a super cute new race outfit!!

4.  My UP band by Jawbone - I try to get in 10,000+ steps a day... going for a run guarantees this will happen! It's my own little nerd reward when I plug in my band and see that I met my goal!

5. This shirt! Don't you think it will make running even better??

6. These faces... how can you resist taking them for a run?

Happy Friday Everyone!! Have a great weekend!

Until Then,

katykatxo

Kate's Favorites*

(*Subject To Change)

Happy Friday the 13th! What a fast week, eh? I passed the 25 day mark in my sober journey - that's 1/4 of the way there! 25% Done! Um, I can't think of any other way to say that mathematically!! I feel great this week, focused on new habits (Teatime anyone?) and I'm really enjoying a new found clarity in my thinking. James and I enjoyed fun date nights with Adi and Nella on Monday night, Jes and Luke on Tuesday night, and then Jose and Amy on Wednesday night... it makes me feel proud that I can be in a restaurant, say "no thanks" to my usual glass (or three!) of wine and walk away with my cheeks hurting from all the laughing. It feels like a huge step for me and I'm so glad to be on this journey.

So anyway, it's FRIDAY!! And on Fridays I present to you... 

Kate's Favorites* 

(*subject to change)

I hope to show you a few of my favorite things from the week... maybe a blog or two... or something I found on Pinterest... or just something super cool that I think you should see! So here are my first favorites!

1. "Dumb Blonde" - Love the look on this dog's face as she tries to catch the cheerio!

2. Tea Forte Brewing System -I've been drinking lot's and lot's of tea as a beverage replacement... It makes it feel like a special occasion using loose leaf tea and a fun mug!! My favorite Forte flavor is White Ginger Pear.

3. DIY Cloud Corkboard - this DIY project would be great for hanging jewelry too!

4. FoodGawker.com - This is my favorite recipe browsing site... takes you right to the blog for each recipe!

5. Broncos Gear - What? Broncos running shorts??? Get in my closet!! Then I can still support even if I'm running during a game!!

6. Isn't this such a good idea??

Hope your week has been great and that you have an awesome weekend!

Until Then,

Katykatxo