Maybe some of the best times??
With more of the best times to follow??

Seasons of Change

As the temperatures drop along with the autumn leaves I find myself hunkering down into a state of calm and reflection. While Summer is so much about going fast and playing hard and "doing" so much, Fall seems to be more about preparing and fortifying for what is to come... (I really want to throw in a Game of Thrones reference but I will resist!).

This has truly been a season of reflection and gratitude for me so far. I reached the fifty day mark in my sober journey last Sunday and I'm so proud of myself. I knew this journey and goal was possible, but I really wasn't sure what it was going to be like, how it would feel, and if I would change through the process. I have a lot of work to do still and though I'm technically halfway, I feel like it's really only just beginning. At this fifty day mark the "shine" is off a bit. While I am so very proud of myself, the smug feeling of accomplishment has faded, leaving what I imagine is a very realistic and common feeling of "now what?". Where even two weeks ago I was focused on saying no to a drink because "no" meant I could cross off another day on my sober calendar, now that "no" has something standing behind it. Now it's more about the why and less about the why-not?... I want to be mindful about all of the decisions in my life, but this one in particular right now.

Having a drink had become such a habit for me, an action that had very little, if any conscious thought behind it. I really want to think about why I'm choosing to say yes or no. The thought that keeps popping up for me is, "would a drink make this occasion better?" I honestly think there are times an adult beverage does add to the moment, but where I was 50+ days ago this was not how I was making the decision... it was all just a mindless habit.

* Side Note Book Talk - I've been reading "The Power of Habit" by Charles Duhigg and it's really been an interesting exploration of why we form habits and how we change them... I'm not finished with the book yet but I'm excited to see how it might help me understand this better.

I really have enjoyed going to dinners, hanging out with friends, celebrating amazing things and people, all while completely sober. It's been a heartening and proud realization for me to understand that I can be fun and relaxed and funny without drinking. Admittedly, there have been times when I really did think a drink would add to the event or occasion (new beer release at The Rockslide, Birthday Celebrations with my Grandparents, finishing a long run, etc.), but sobriety certainly, without doubt, did not take away from these experiences. I can honestly say that I would choose a lifetime of sobriety over ever going back to where I was just a few short weeks ago. Being sober has lifted a dark and heavy blanket from my soul, giving me the strength and hope to work through the things that were really dragging me down. It's a journey that I understand will take longer than 100 days, but I really feel like the seasons are changing and I can't wait to see what's ahead.

Until then,
katykatxo

Time Flies...

The days race into weeks, the weeks speed by into months, and before you know it seasons have passed and the things you once were simply planning for have come and gone. On one hand this makes me sad, but the other hand is so full of the good things that have happened lately I realize I need that sad hand to get over it and help me carry it all! It's been an amazing couple of weeks with lots to celebrate and enjoy.

I've realized quickly that I really need to be taking more pictures in order to make this blog a truly fun and enjoyable one! Luckily in two weeks time I will be taking a photography class followed by a Photoshop class and I hope I can challenge myself to take and publish more current photos... this post about all the great things would definitely be more fun if I had pictures of all the events!

Last weekend my youngest brother Danny and his dog Sampson drove to Colorado from California to spend a week with us. Sampson will be staying in Colorado as Danny gets ready to deploy in the near future. It's been SO fun to have them both living with us! I had pretty much left the house by the time Danny was 12 or 13, so I never really had the chance to live with him as peers like I did my brother Scott. I've loved having him close even for a short while. Sampson has so far fit right in with our dogs... Gus is in heaven having a crazy friend to play with all day. Millie is... adjusting.





Happy Dogs
Sampson, Gus, and Millie



Once Danny and Sampson arrived we got a few hours of sleep and then packed up and headed over to Ft. Collins to celebrate my Grandparent's 80th birthdays. Here is where I really wish I had taken some pictures, it was so great to celebrate these two amazing people together with lots family. We had almost all the family there but we missed our Pennsylvania cousins so much! It was a really special night with lots of stories and laughs. I hit my 50 days of sobriety on Sunday and though I really wanted to enjoy a glass of wine with the amazing lobster boil we had, I enjoyed the evening so much even without it. James and I were lucky to spend one night with my brother Scott and sister-in-law Carrie which equaled extra time with them. Then we hopped right back in the car and cruised home listening to a very interesting and tense Broncos game on the radio. All told this was only a 24 hour trip, but packed full of great moments and memories.

James took this fantastic photo in Vail.

 

Since we got back we've been working with the dogs and trying to get Sampson settled in with the pack. I think it's going to go really well, I'm excited to have Sampson as part of our family for a few months!

 

 

I also finished a fun craft project at home. I was going to try and take step by step photos, but again, not so good at taking pictures very frequently. So basically I ordered a 4'x2' 24-gauge paintable metal panel cut to fit a random popout over my kitchen counter. The metal panel is pretty lightweight, but not so thin that it would be too flexible. I painted it with four coats of aerosol chalkboard paint... look a picture!

I then marked out a 7x6 grid of 3"x3" squares and used a paint marker to create a permanent calendar grid on the top of the metal panel that I can modify each month. I added Sunday - Saturday initials using a paint marker at the top, sweet talked James into helping me screw it to the wall, and voila! A magnetic chalkboard in my kitchen! The chalkboard pens that are available now make it really fun and easy to use and decorate. I'm really happy with the results...



 

 

So it's really been a crazy past week... I'm looking forward to slowing down a little bit this weekend and spending time with James celebrating our one year anniversary. It's hard to believe a year ago I was getting ready to marry my best friend! Time flies when you're having fun!

 

until then,

katykatxo

Kate's Favorites*

(*Subject To Change)

Wow. I was all ready to do a Friday post before the weekend and then here we are at Wednesday already!! And October is here too!! Where does the time go?

It's been a busy last few days. As my dad would say, I'm running an intergalactic doggie daycare lately! We are preparing to welcome a third dog into our family for the next eight or nine months when my youngest brother brings his husky Sampson to us this weekend! Danny is deploying next month and Sampson is coming from Southern California to enjoy a Colorado winter. We are really hoping all the dogs get along and that life continues on mostly as usual even with an extra beast around! I'm really trying to enjoy some quality time with my furbabies before the new kid arrives. We also had Gus' girlfriend Merra with us last weekend, and man, that is a circus! Gus and Merra stay revved at 100% the entire time they are together. They have so much fun together and they are EXHAUSTED when Merra goes home...

Sweet Mera

Gus loves having his girlfriend Mera around! She is a sweetheart, but snores louder than any human I've ever met! I feel bad for my husband when I'm elbowing him at night thinking it's him snoring, but finding out it's actually Merra!

Handsome Sampson - Can't wait to have him here

I think having Sampson around will be good for Gus and Millie too, even if it means making some changes around the house to make it all work! I think he will LOVE going snowshoeing this winter.

How about some favorites from the week?

1. Finished this fun craft!

2. Ordered the materials for something like this magnetic chalkboard calendar! I will put up my step-by-step DIY next week! *I did finish my version and I LOVE it! I will post some pictures and instructions later!

3.  My new laptop!! Yay for a machine that doesn't groan and buzz and overheat!

4.  My awesome and amazing grandparents... The whole family (minus some cousins :(...) will be gathering together in Ft. Collins this weekend to celebrate their 80th birthdays... Can't wait!

5. This guy... we are celebrating our first anniversary next weekend. Can't believe it's been a year!

Have an awesome rest of the week!

Until then,

katykatxo